Here Comes Peter Cottontail: The Movie

WARNING: This is my longest review I’ve ever written. Viewers’ discretion is advised.

Oh the migrants. This is “sequel” to a Here Comes Peter Cottontail, as Here Comes Peter Cottontail: The Movie!

Out of the all of the  Rankin Bass related sequel, this is by far the worst I’ve seen. I know that’s real early to say that before we get to the others, but it’s true. This is the Batman & Robin to Batman ’89, Belle’s Magical World to Beauty and the Beast, the Trolls 2 to live-action Trolls, etc.. I wanted to rip this “film” for a long time, and now I have the privilege and opportunity to review it. Stronger if this was in video recording, but I got my limitations with a lack of a good camera, good recording space, and self-confident, but written review in blogger will do for now.

Peter Cottontail as Chief Easter Bunny has a son, Peter Cottontail Jr. (how original. For the rest of the review, I’ll refer him as Diet. Only Indiana Jones and few others deserve the name “Junior”. He’s just one calorie, not Cottontail enough. While the Senior would be refer as Pepsi One.). Diet wants to be an inventor in an “advanced” April Valley, and doesn’t want to be the next chief bunny (when did Chief Easter Bunny selection went for nepotism?). Peter is annoyed with Diet with how his inventions are a waste, so he has an idea to have Diet to watch the Clock Tower to protect the Spring of Spring, invented by Father Time (So the original film was in the same continuity as Rudolph Shiny New Years. Or is it?) 

The villain, Jackie Frost (Please insert your own Killer Frost/ Elsa/ Snow Queen/ White Bitch/ Susan Frost/ Ice Queen jokes here. She’s voiced by Molly Shannon) wants Winter to be around forever as she lives in her Mount Krumpit. She teams up with Diet Iron Tail (not the son, it’s the same villain, sorta.) to steal the Spring of Spring. Like an idiotic example of the next generation, he let Jackie Frost steal the Spring and left Irontail to “guard” the Clock Tower. Just like his father, he ran away in a rain to make it up his mistake to him. Jackie Frost and Irontail decided to steal the other season’s mcguffins. In assuming Summerville, Diet got bump by a robin named Flutter (Fluttershy: Nay! He’s voiced by Keenan Thompson.) The villains stole the Sun of Summer.

Suddenly, Diet and Flutter went to (Fallville?) to save a mouse name Munch (you wouldn’t know the name until the third act. She’s voiced by Miranda Cosgrove of ICarly.), as the villains stole the Leaf of Autumn as part of the complete collection.

They stumble upon “Mr Sassafras” in Color Land and he has them travel in a bubble, but stumble the squidbilly of the East by South Wind named Wind (why not Southeast Wind?)

  

There’s not much worth to spoil, so here’s the rest.

The “heroes” got to Jackie Frost’s lair to retrieve the mcguffins. They got away through snow sliding from the Ice Age movie, as they get to the Winter Clock. Diet steals the Flake of Winter (that’s what I call it and they don’t.) to make a deal with the villains to get the mcguffins back. The villains get defeated from each other (twice, and even Jackie Frost’s ice beam got rebound from a key to the clock tower. Strange that she can easily freeze the clock tower, but not the key to one?).

As the heroes returned the mcguffins back to their respective season, and Diet saved April Valley.

At least with other related sequel, they at least capture the spirit of the original source, but not this abomination. It’s pretty bad when Rudolph and the Island of Misfit Toys (what was originally the worst CGI Rankin Bass film) has capture their spirit, voices, and design of the original Rudolph film. This is the second and last CGI film of the sequel, and thanks God! The production was done by Classic Media, they’re mostly known best for distributing most of the Rankin Bass films and Casper, but they’re known for their worst when they actually produced their original films. This film is the first of many of their crappy line-up in terrible eye bulging, chibi CGI with Casper Scare School aka Pre-Monster High, terrible hand drawn with Legend of Frosty the Snowman, and terrible flash animated with George of the Jungle and Kung-fu Magoo, which would end them. This is why Dreamworks Animation bought most of the properties from them. Yes, I know it’s direct to DVD films, but it’s pretty bad when a company pump out this many crap in the worst time for animations in the late 2000’s, and this was release in the same year as Chicken Little.

From the first second we open with crappy unemotional pop song that's throughout the film with flash animated bunnies that’s more suited for another film to a minute and fifty second to spot a horrendous design of Mr. Sassafras. Yeah, look at this; he looks nothing like the original! I know Danny Kaye is dead, and would be disrespectful to use his shell, but he was his own character and it could have been easier to say he’s a relative of his along with his identical cousin, Marmaduke (Emperor’s New Clothing). This tall man Oompa-Loompa is on par with another Christopher Lloyd CGI character of Mr. Clipboard from Foodfight, if not, worst.

Of course it’s a sign of bad sequel to not get the character right, but made bad when they use footage of the original Peter Cottontail follow with the new design. Just like these following bad animated sequels such as Secret of Nimh 2,

Then there’s Iron Tail. What in name of Edgar Allen Poe did you do to the villain, film? I didn’t care much that they changed his fur from purple gray to crap brown as it helps stick out from the winter sky background despite purple rarely blend into anything that I proved with photoshop, but they didn’t even try on the voice. 

The voice actor is Roger Moore of James Bond. While he’s not a bad actor, he’s the wrong signature voice for a signature Vincent Price character. Don’t even tell me there’s no Vincent Price impressionist, there’s about a few to name! Dan Castenella did his voice in the Super Bowl episode of Simpsons, Duck Dodger has Sinestro voiced by John de Lancie (yes, Discord from My Little Ponies: Friendship Is Magic.) that does sound close to Vincent Price, even Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated brought Vincent Van Ghoul (Vincent Price’s character in 13 Ghost of Scooby Doo, this time voiced by Maurice LaMarche.) back years later. There’s no excuse here, unless they had some auditions, but so much actors realized how crappy this was.

Speaking of Scooby Doo, I know Casey Kasem didn’t reprise his role. Granted, he was going to retire the Shaggy voice as he was going to make his last brief voice role as Uncle Albert in Shaggy and Scooby Doo Get A Clue. His replacement is Tom Kenny, voiced Senior and Junior Cottontail. He’s not a bad choice, yet every time I hear them, I don’t hear an older Cottontail or a different character; I end up hearing Johnny Test’s Dad and Raimundo (Xiaolin Showdown) speaking in dull techno babble and often useless as Brainy Smurf. Diet (Peter Cottontail Jr.) spend majority of the film making a catapult that went nowhere, fixes his mistake that it was his fault for being stupid, most of the happened on their own. You can take him out, and he wouldn’t affect much, except when he removed Winter to make worldwide doom. Remind me again who the bigger villain is?

Peter married Darla or not, no one refer her as her first name, but assuming it’s Daria due to some connection with Peter, yet still appeared a lot less than the first film, thus making her as useless as Antoine (who I know noticed has swap main color with Irontail, making him look like he was frozen today), and we kept cutting to him searching as much as the dogs looking for Scamp in Lady and the Tramp 2. In fact, it’s not the same Antoine since the first film ends with him as a butterfly. He’s more likely to be his descendant since caterpillar’s lives are shorter, so it’s Antoine the 5^th or 10^th or whatever year this film take place.

Why even call it “The Movie”? The runtime to this film is only 10 minute more than the original. Is it considered to be one, because that extra 10 minute means it count as a movie on TV (despite it was mostly seen once on This TV and Cartoon Network)? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Hop is better than this. At least EB want to do a hobby of being a drummer that wasn’t connected to the factory, the CGI on the rabbits are better rendered, and the factory look slightly better, but never as good as Willy Wonka’s. I’m pretty sure there’s some catapult part of the updated factory in phoned April Valley, so Diet’s inventions wouldn’t matter if his invention is an improvement in an “improving” setting. Only other idea he has is to change old clocks to digital with rapping. Not worth the downgrade.

Speaking of the setting, the background is overly bright colors on par with Speed Racer and Teen Titans Go (except for night, snow, and rain), and real fake. It’s pretty bad when the plants in the Garden of Surprise are looking better color balanced, better detailed, better rendered, and more three dimensional that this flat land. Same for the side characters.

    

The only good thing in this film was a line from Munch.

“If I wasn’t so bored, I would have some buffalo wings.”

                                                                        -Munch.

“What!”

             -Flutter.

Bottom line, this film is a rotten egg. I didn’t like it when it was first released. I gave it a second chance and more, and there’s no point of changing its label, it leads failure. I have a perfect expression from the first film to sum up this sequel.

To who’ll obnoxiously or calmly ask “How will you do this film better?” I have an idea on how to do a good continuation of Peter Cottontail. Peter Cottontail enjoyed the traditions of Easter and the enjoyment from the kids’ reaction of joy. However, he grew some doubt as Chief Easter Bunny as time went on to 1985. The kids he knew in the nearest town grew up and mostly stop celebrating Easter and the next generation has less interest in the holiday. Closest friends he got are Donna, Antoine’s kids, aging Mr. Sassafras, and Bonnie’s group. Peter decided to get together with the other Easter Bunnies in America, thus retcon the other Easter films as they’re the represented Easter Bunny of their location oppose to just one Easter Bunny in the entire world. Irontail can be involved without scheming, and even connect to the other Easter film’s villain, but Peter almost had a moment that Irontail could be right at the timing of 1985. The story is sort of Year Without Santa Claus with the believing part of Rise of the Guardians, but relating with the feeling of Easter, and may be a parallel to Rankin Bass’ career and films. Best if this was made in stop-motion, but have CGI to help with the stop-motion than being distracted. Best actor to play Peter Cottontail is either Scott Manville or Matthew Lillard since they have experience playing Shaggy currently.

  For now, if I can gather up all the DVD of this film and separate it from the special feature of the original in a double feature, then I shall hide this “film”, where you will never find it again!